Google Something Clever 2.0: My Magic Tattoo

Oct 30, 2012

My Magic Tattoo

I haven't had a lot of time to write lately, what with Halloween and Frankenstorm and all that. I do have a quick little story for you, though. This story is almost four years old and I love to tell it. I told it a couple times at a party on Saturday, and I realized I should share it with everyone.

***There is a picture at the end of this post, so try to control your scroll, because it's a spoiler.***

As you may have heard, I have a whole bunch of tattoos. Many of them are small homemade tattoos I gave myself with a sewing needle and calligraphy ink when I was a teenager. Gruesome, I know. I grew up in a small town that was so boring, you literally had to tattoo yourself just to stay awake.

One such tattoo is a little black outline of a heart just above my right hip. When I got pregnant, I assumed it was going to stretch and look all kinds of nasty, but I figured I could just have it removed (I've already had a couple of my other homemade ones removed, and it was no big deal).

Throughout my whole pregnancy, the tattoo never changed. It seemed that it was just outside the area that stretched. I also used cocoa butter lotion on my stomach, butt and thighs every day, which smelled horrible, but I never got stretch marks, so maybe that helped. Who knows?

The day my son was born (via c-section, if that matters) I was changing my nightgown when my husband looked over at me and said, "Holy shit, look at your tattoo!" I replied the same way I always do when people say something like that: "Uh, which one?" He tells me the heart tattoo, and I look down at it, and it had doubled. Not stretched, doubled. Like, it became two interlocked hearts.

I know there's a perfectly logical scientific explanation for this, probably something involving the dermis and epidermis, or whatever, but I don't want to hear it. I don't believe in anything spiritual or magical, but the symbolism is just way too cool, so I'm going to roll with it. It's not my prettiest tattoo, but now it's my favorite.