Google Something Clever 2.0: Coulrophobia

Feb 19, 2013

Coulrophobia

Don't worry; I won't make you look it up. I am afraid of clowns. That's what it means. What scares me about them is that you don't know what's going on under that makeup. It could be anyone. Why are they hiding their face, you know? And no, I didn't get this way by watching or reading "It." It started long before that...


When I was in first grade, I had a recurring nightmare. And I mean, every night. I was on the playground at recess. At the far end of the playground was a clown. He had a huge bunch of balloons in his hand, and he was passing them out to all the children. I watched him. One by one, the kids ran up to him and took a balloon. They'd turn to walk away, and after taking a few steps, they'd disappear into thin air. The balloon each child had been holding would slowly float away. I was the only one who noticed.

The crowd was thinning as more and more children fell prey to this evil clown and his tainted balloons. My best friend stepped up to him. I tried to shout, but no sound came out. Everything started to slow down. She reached up for the balloon. The clown selected one, and bent down to hand it to her. Then he looked right at me, and grinned. Just as she grasped the string, I woke up.

Every night.

You'd be scared of clowns, too.